Posts by Lynn Zakeri

You know that voice I am talking about. The one that never blames, criticizes and guilts… anyone but yourself. Oftentimes when I talk with clients about their inner voice, tears come immediately. Whether they are fifteen or fifty, they know exactly what I am talking about. Their harsh critic. Their unforgiving words. Their denial of…

Three years ago I lost someone close to me to cancer. Jenna was my friend of 20 years and also my sister in law. I came back from her funeral and looked at my week ahead. I had more clients that week than ever, and as much as I love (LOVE!) what I do, I…

“You’ve gained some weight. Is everything OK?” “I saw your son’s name in the paper for a DUI. How is he doing?” “Your son told mine that his dad has a bad temper. I thought you should know that.” “You lost a lot of weight and look different. How are you?” “I heard you have…

As a therapist, I have to always be conscious of countertransference. Over identifying is a caution we learned about in grad school, and during sessions I make sure to catch myself and keep it in check. Fighting with your spouse? Yep, been there. Concerned about your children? Always. Just plain hard on yourself? Often. The…

Today I was a hypocrite.I stood in a long line waiting for a ticket while I watched the 20-something-year-old behind the desk chew his gum and work at a leisurely pace while several other employees walked by without offering any assistance. The other “older” people in line said things like “I’ve been waiting for 20…

If I could go back in time, I would do a lot of things differently. The more I thought about this statement, the more I thought. From elementary school to high school… college… to being a wife, a friend, a sister… don’t even get me started on being a mother. We all have regrets. We…

Teenagers are having sex.  It almost feels inappropriate to write this.  Why?  They have been having sex for decades, centuries, so why would that feel inappropriate?  According to the CDC in 2011, almost 50% of teens have had sex.  That is a lot.  It is half of a high school.  Half of the Honors kids. …

Horse tranquilizers?  That is what kids will take today to get high?  Not only will they take Ketamine, but they have already given it the nickname of Special K, or just “K” for short.  While this drug is more regularly used on humans, adolescents know this drug as a horse tranquilizer and still continue to…

A new Harvard study has shown that the quality of teachers matters over the long term, leading to more earning potential, a greater likelihood of attending college, and even a decrease in teenage pregnancy. I read on, curious about what made these teachers “good”. Having previously worked in a school setting, I was not surprised…

I wish I had a dollar for every time a client said to me that my children are so fortunate to be parented by me. They have benefitted from my practical suggestions themselves and at times even marvel (to my delight!) at my wisdom. I then promptly remind them that when your heart is involved,…